Feebee – 6 DPO

Absolutely no symptoms! Boob pain and nipple changes – gone, cramping – gone, nausea – gone. Still have creamy CM, so that’s something. Am feeling very emotional today but MIL is very ill so that could be it. Could also be PMT unfortunately, as AF arrived at 10dpo last month.

Perhaps because I’m feeling a little down today, I’m thinking that I won’t last the day without testing. I know this is a slippery slope, and that it only takes one HPT to open the testing floodgates. I have 50 of them at home and am telling myself “what’s the harm?”. Help! If I can even make it to 7dpo I will be doing better than last month.

Feebee – 5 DPO

I’ve had conflicting symptoms today – first the bad: About a week before AF arrives I usually get a feeling of weakness and lightheadedness for a few minutes. I reported this last month at 4dpo, and lo and behold AF arrived at 10dpo. Had it at lunchtime today, but it was much more severe than usual, lasted about half an hour and was accompanied by nausea and cold sweats. Still feel quite nauseous and fairly tired.

On the positive side, yesterday afternoon’s CM no-show was superceded by lots of creamy CM in the evening. Loads more today. Have had sore boobs on and off and a dull ache behind them. However, I have also had muscular pain in my upper back (no idea what’s causing it, no doubt it’s unrelated to my cycle), which may be contributing to the overall ache in my upper torso.

After dinner last night I felt pretty queasy, tried to ignore it but ended up legging it upstairs to vomit (probably a tummy bug). Felt pretty awful afterwards, came downstairs, but had to run again for a repeat perfomance. Stomach didn’t settle down for a good while afterwards, but when it did I had mild AF cramping in my lower abdomen. Have had this again today, but it’s hardly noticeable. Have also had flutters in my tummy for the past two days and have been burping quite a lot!

I have tried to be as objective as possible when describing symptoms, so am reluctant to report those that I’m not sure about. I’m not 100% about this but think it’s worth mentioning: I think my nipples are a bit bigger and darker than usual. DH usually tells me to stop getting myself worked up when I mention something like this, but did say this morning that they don’t look darker but they do look a bit bigger.

I haven’t had the urge to test at all, as I know there’s no point at the moment. Is this objective, common sense approach consistent with pregnancy? Or should my hormones be making me behave irrationally at this stage???

PS Have continued to feel really nauseous for the past few hours.

Feebee – 4 DPO

I’ve decided I’m going to enjoy this 2ww and hope for the best, as there’s nothing I can do to change the outcome at this stage. In fact, I’m going to relish every nipple twinge and stomach cramp. And if it doesn’t work out, then I am going to get well and truly pissed (that’s drunk for our American readers!).

I had mild AF cramps on and off yesterday. I don’t remember if I had these in August (pregnant cycle) but I definitely didn’t have them at this stage last month. None today though. My CM was still creamy yesterday, but thicker and sort of crumbly when dry. Hardly any today – same as last month but different to pregnant cycle when I had creamy CM throughout the 2ww. Boobs feel sort of heavy, but not sore to the touch. I’m not particularly tired or hungry and don’t need to pee more than usual. Oh, one more thing, a blinding headache came upon me suddenly last night and I couldn’t shake it so went to bed. Gone today.

AF arrived at 10dpo last month, so I could be less than a week away from finding out. Yikes!

Feebee – 2 DPO

Just a quick note to say that boobs are sore, still have slight O pains, have had creamy CM for the last 2 days and am tired and slightly nauseous (probably due to late night last night). Hope everyone is having a good weekend!

PS Also had bad stomach cramps twice today.

Feebee – 1 DPO

Woohoo, look at today’s title!!! I’m back on board, on the 2ww! Come on the creamy CM!

Still in the BD zone and plan to be until Sunday, just in case. We had our first TTC falling out last night. DH got home late and drunk so wasn’t willing or able. As it was O day, obviously that wasn’t an option. He did understand the urgency, but had “gone off sex today” and just wanted to go to sleep. To cut a long story short, we did do the deed but I wouldn’t exactly call it “lovemaking”.

I got another + OPK yesterday, as strong, if not stronger, than the previous day. O pains are gone today though, so I suppose I just had plenty of LH in my system.

The only symptoms I have today are slightly sore boobs (from O) and very high levels of excitement (for BFP). Am going to pamper myself this afternoon so that I’m looking absolutely gorgeous for testing in 2 weeks (ish).

Feebee – CD16

There’s no question that I’m ovulating today, have had strong cramps since I woke up this morning (yay!). Hopefully this means that my egg is as determined as I am to get it right this month.

So, technically I could be pregnant already! Was thinking about this and wondering what it would be like if we could tell as soon as we conceived. Then realised that this could mean a 2 week wait for AF to arrive. Better to wait in hope than in despair – that’s my diagnosis.

I’m fairly excited about the 2ww now. I have had side-by-side a pregnant and a non-pregnant cycle, so have a good idea of which symptoms may be significant and which are not worth getting flustered about. Most importantly, I am not going to test until 8/9dpo, I am not going to test until 8/9dpo, I am not going to test until 8/9dpo, I am not going to test until 8/9dpo, I am not going to test until 8/9dpo, I am not going to test until 8/9dpo……………..

Feebee – CD15

Eh, sorry ’bout the “woe is me” outburst the other day. Now, where were we?

I managed to sneak a brief rendezvous with DH before I left on Monday, and got home late last night, so no loss of productivity after all!

After a day of EWCM it’s back to the watery CM today. BUT finally got + on OPK today so only a couple of days to go to the 2ww. So, fasten your seatbelts, here we go again………….

Feebee – CD13

Off to West Cork tonight, so will have a couple of days off TTC both physically and mentally. No sign of O yet, let’s hope it stays away for another couple of days. Am still having very watery CM, definitely not EWCM – anyone had this before?

I am tired of TTC. I’m tired of putting a brave face on things, and playing the waiting game day after day, month after month. I miss living in the moment, going out with friends and not worrying how much I drink, or what cycle day it is. I’m tired of feeling “past it” when my life has barely begun. I wanna have fun!!!

And I want a baby. And so do most of the people reading this. Thank god for the Internet – we don’t have to do it alone.

Feebee – CD12

TTC has finally taken over my life. My friend’s mother died yesterday, and attending the removal and funeral will involve one and maybe two nights away from home, and more importantly, DH. I have no problem rearranging work and home life, but this will take place at O time, so I’m torn between doing the right thing and sneaking off early to ensure I am not away from DH for two nights. I’ll probably stay as long as I can on the 2nd day (day of funeral), then drive home through the night, having warned DH to be ready to welcome me with open arms in the early hours.

We’re in full-on TTC mode at the moment, and we’re making an extra effort so it doesn’t become an ordeal. So far, so good. Also doing plenty of knicker-watching – have had lots of watery CM for the last couple of days, not sure what this means, if anything. Have had zero on OPK so far, but not expecting that until at least tomorrow.

Seems like my hormones haven’t had time to settle down yet. Spent yesterday morning sobbing over such important issues as how much I love DH and DS, and how much I miss John Peel. Soon after, I spent a 20 mile car journey singing (unaccompanied) at the top of my voice and freaking out/pissing off DH. A couple of days after my miscarriage, despite an overwhelming feeling of loss and sadness, I kept getting rushes of “high” and fits of giggles. I was fully aware that these feelings resulted from chemical processes, and just waited for them to pass. Same yesterday. Had a fun solo singsong though!

Feebee – CD10

Woohoo, the bleeding has finally stopped and I have regular CM (a bit creamy!) so we’re back in business. I got zero on an OPK today, but we might as well get some practice in anyway.

I’m excited that it’s all about to start again, but incredibly daunted at the thought that we might have to go through all the ups and downs of TTC for any longer than the next few weeks. I don’t know how I’ll get through another AF, but I know I will if I have to. And one day we’ll have another beautiful, incredible child and we’ll all live happily ever after. And this time next year we’ll be millionaires!